so i was supposed to be to work at 8..but its 9:15 and im currently standing stoned in the middle of holiday...with a bag with three doughnuts, two redbulls, and a slim jim..
god i miss watching you do this...
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
It's like, "you literally have no idea who i am but i definitely slept with your brother in your bed."
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Randomize
