spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
i don't think fitbit tracks "flipping the fuck out" as activity.
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
I'm feeding a baby and swiping on tinder...what has my life come to?!?!
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
Randomize
