You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
It's no shave November. This is our time.
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
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