Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
You know you're good at multi-tasking if you can get a lap dance from someone while simultaneously eating a burrito.
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
Randomize
