She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
Found a pic on my phone from last night. You're drunk. Arm wrestling some guy. In the bar bathroom. At a baby changing station. It's my new wallpaper.
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
Randomize
