girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
No joke, I just found $85 on the ground. Must be because I bought you all that liquor. So much good karma.
who orders an old fashioned in 2014? even my Grandparents think you're an asshole.
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
Randomize
