ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
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