you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
She has an emergency bra in her purse. I'm gonna check no on the 'introducing her to my new boyfriend' box.
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
Randomize
