I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
And I feel like pitchers of margaritas accidentally make it down your throat a lot.
I mean, the lady at the Mexican restaurant insisted. She said she would win a prize if she sold another pitcher before noon. And plus I got to wear a sombrero
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
how do you play pong handcuffed?
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
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