So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
you never keep up with shots anymore
I'm trying to be more responsible these days
you fucking tried to take your pants off and pee in Taco Bell's parking lot
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
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