Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
Either allow it in a formal toast or i will drunkenly tell your in-laws while i'm dancing on their table. either way, the truth is coming out
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
I tried sex in a car once. It was like trying to do yoga in a drainage pipe with your arms and legs tied while using a typewriter with your penis.
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Drunk me is having trouble keeping up with sober me's standards
This may be the most redneck thing I've ever said, but I know all there is to know about farting dogs
Randomize
