i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
so my 6 year old came home from school and asked me if he was a bastard cause the kids at school called him one, i told him to call them a clit. those parents will hate me
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
She needs sedatives and a leash
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
Apparently I made a chicken patty, angrily took it out of the microwave, walked outside, and threw it over the balcony. #me
what the fuck happened to the tacos
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