fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
Cops said there's a crazy dude with a mask in my neighborhood. Don't get stabbed.
If he was naked that was me.
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
Use "feeling words"
Yay
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
If making out with three guys at once at a Kesha concert while simultaneously smearing glitter all over yourself doesn't convince her you're gay, nothing will
So I was putting on a condom and looked to my right to not make eye contact, she said did you just look at the American flag while putting that on. I said this one's for Team USA.
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
Randomize
