He is like the real live version of the state fair..
I called the bar to ask if they found my Id and credit card and they remembered me as 'the girl who signed her receipt in blood'
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
We just FaceTimed and I put an Oreo in my vagina for him. Now he has to fly across the globe for me.
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
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