it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
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