Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
I've never seen anyone as high as you were.. you collapsed onto the kitchen floor hugging a tub of ice cream. You named it phil.
It seems that I didn’t convey clearly enough how well and truly fucked we are, Jack. Listen to me very closely: we are DEAD.
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
Randomize
