it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
OH MY GOD MY UBER DRIVER IS PEEING BEHIND A DUMPSTER
Still got in the car though
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Trouble in the neighborhood - turns out my brother's summer lawn care gig also entailed banging three different MILFs and they just all found out about each other
Gotta pay for college somehow...
Randomize
