Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.
Me + Nice restaurant + Copious amounts of booze + obscene comments to couples = valentine's day plans
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
So do you remember the bartender that caught me when I fell off the bar 4 weeks ago? He hasn't been to work since...Woops.
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
Fuck. I think I can already feel tomorrow's hangover. It's like future me cane back to warn present me about the impending doom but didn't turn the time dial back far enough.
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
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