so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
Also, my old intern Lizzie whom you fed pizza to last night wants to hang out with you
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
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