I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
The last mom I slept with was the worst lay ever. Imagine fucking a hairy wet pillow for 60 minutes. Good luck with your milf. I was joking about the Susan Boyle comment btw.
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
Sober me is really good at getting to the airport on time. Drunk me is really good at shitting my pants. Do you know how much pants cost at the airport????
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
Having to grow a landing strip to cover the bruises from pole dancing. Thanks for the birthday present, but next time, maybe just a gift card?
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
Randomize
