"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
Phrase i just heard while watching the U.S. open: "Boy they have really trimmed it well, this has got to be the tightest hole in the Open."
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
I went on a psycho cleaning spree so I feel I've earned the right to spend the day in bed watching porn and eating sausage biscuits. If you bring alcohol you can join me.
All other girlfriends are inferior. You are the chosen one.
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
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