I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country.
I think the secretary can hear it when I fart in the bathroom, how do you think she feels about that?
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
I jizzed in his mayonnaise and put it back in the fridge. Shouldn't have stolen my weed.
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
Randomize
