Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
Sockward: that moment during sexytimes when you realize your socks are still on and you have no idea how to remove them in a non-awkward fashion.
"She's seriously grinding on him while whispering into his ear, 'take me to McDonald's.'"
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize
