Where did you get a picture of my penis
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
My buddy just got straight up kicked out of the bar on my bday for water boarding people with beer and bar towels
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
Randomize
