Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
Randomize
