after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
Randomize
