She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
I just saw a dog and thought "Hey! A goat!" Then realized it was a dog. Now I'm sad.
Last night I saw a drag queen take a shot of Red Hot that was soaked into a tampon. I fucking love my life!
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
how do i say, "my ex is going to be at this party so don't look like shit" without sounding like a bitch?
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Randomize
