My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
Within the hour, he sent me 8 texts and 4 voice memos. One of the memos was just him whistling for 3 minutes. ...It's official, I attract the crazies.
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
Ok thats great. so just to recap: you fucked a billionare in his penthouse last night, and I had a glass of wine on the toilet.
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
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