therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
I said ACK before Andy Samberg made it even remotely funny. That tool is stealing all my lines.
Yeah, you've definitely been jizzing in your pants years before he made it socially acceptable
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
Randomize
