My parents took my cat for a ride in the car. Second weekend in a row. They think its fun. Dear God
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
he had hair everywhere except his balls
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
Randomize
