So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
Woke up this morning at my parent's house. No idea how I got here... what happened last night? Was it bad?
We using my standards or yours?
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
I had to download the flashlight app so I could finish taking a dump when the power went out.
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
Randomize
