too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
Randomize
