therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
Whoever had sex in my bed during the party last night left a glow in the dark condom on my floor. I'm not even mad anymore, I just want to know who it is so they can tell me where to get one.
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
I'm so horny right now but I JUST put my fuckin lasagna in the oven
He's on the porch naked. Help.
Randomize