I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
i think i just naturally attract stoners
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