You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
60% of the guys I've slept with are on my holiday greeting card mailing list. I'm an amazing ex lover.
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
Never again will I go to my mom's side of the family's parties. After the bride and groom cut the head off the roasted pig together they boarded their RV and rode off into the sunset.
Randomize
