Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
The fool I made of myself at the Ugly Christmas Sweater party last night was surpassed this morning when I walk of shamed 6 miles at 7am with one mysterious wet leg and no pants on. I think my mom saw me and waved.
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
We duck taped Dave to a rolling chair and shoved him in the bed of the truck then took off for a bit.. We didn't explain it that way when the nurse asked what happened though.
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
Randomize
