what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
i drank out of a bidet.
apparently it isn't appropriate to tell a coworker who is eating celery because it's "negative calories" that a blowjob is too
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
Emergency! LinkedIn connected me to a hotornot hookup from sophomore year... slutty phase sphere has officially invaded grown up professional sphere. My illusions of interweb sexual anonymity have been exploded.
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
Randomize
