I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
I feel like if your cat could talk she would call me a cunt.
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
He said he was trying to live vicariously through me. I didn't have the heart to tell him that meant he was vicariously fucking his best friend.
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
We're not piercing ourselves today.
Doing 9 month old dishes in my bath tub. These dishes literally had enough time to gestate a human child
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Randomize
