Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
i need to find a birthday card for her that tells her how happy i am that i can now legally bang her
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
Will exercising make me less horny?
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