So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
Waking and baking in my bathtub. In a giant sweater. And no pants. This is going to be the best 420 ever.
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
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