i don't plan on having that self control this summer
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
And one night I got way too drunk and thought he said call me a polish name so I called him Konrad. Now he thinks I cheated on him with a Konrad.
That's my new pick up line call me a polish name
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
Randomize
