p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
I worked so hard to shave everything last night. EVERYTHING. He WILL be answering my phone calls. Otherwise he's passing up awesome random birthday sex.
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
Randomize
