My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
I'm gonna need you to NOT let me play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time.
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
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