Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
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