Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
When she gives birth, I'm so playing 'Eye of the Tiger'
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
The lady at target couldn't scan my grocery item and just looked at me and said "just take it. I hate this fucking place". Best munchie adventure yet.
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
Randomize
