ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
My boss just texted me, clearly drunk, and said get down here pronto with a handle of rum, 50 lbs. of cold cuts, and a BB gun. This is not why I went to law school.
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
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