her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
It was one time. Now I have to constantly remind her my name is Jessica not Jizzica.
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
Well, I'm getting my ex-boyfriend to get me a z pack to cure the chlamydia I got from my married fuck buddy so that I can fuck one of my students.
Apparently he proposed after he saw me chug vodka out of a traffic cone.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
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