Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
Drunk cheerio confetti may seem like a brilliant idea when your drunk, but believe me, the next day, its a horrible, horrible mess.
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
So apparently my bro is going to make me fix his tattoo this trip... He sent me a pic of said tattoo. Tattoo is of a sperm, on his penis, which was in a woman's mouth... Wth
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