Heybabeimwearingurpanties
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
I would totes be making out with random people in the name of america if I was at the white house right now
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
Randomize
