So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
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